dominospizzadelivery:

"Hey can u check if that milk went bad?"

*opens fridge*

*milk has leather jacket on smoking a cigarette*

"It’s bad alright"

(via retiredjesus)

  • iPhone user: I'm so excited to get the iPhone 6
  • Android user: Why do people with iPhones think they're so much better than everyone else
  • iPhone user: I just like this pho-
  • Android user: The Samsung Anus5000 had that screen *snort* like 2 years ago! *glomping noise* How are you enjoying 2012 you mindless sheeple?? *uses inhaler to suppress incoming asthma attack*

officialfrenchtoast:

when you’re on your computer & your mom calls you to do chores

image

(via donnacabonna)